


Far From Home

by Lady_of_Rohan



Category: Fallout 4
Genre: Angst, Coping, Crying, Dreams, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Family, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Loneliness, Loss, Memories
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-14
Updated: 2016-04-14
Packaged: 2018-06-02 03:55:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6549556
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_of_Rohan/pseuds/Lady_of_Rohan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thrust into a world so unlike the one she used to know, the Sole Survivor is caught between the fond memories of her past, and the bleakness of her future.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Far From Home

**Author's Note:**

> The first half of this was a very vivid dream that I had recently. I couldn't get it out of my head, and it's rare that I dream about my OCs, so I wanted to put it into writing, with my own additions. 
> 
> I thought this would be a good first introduction to my Survivor Dolores, as I've grown very attached to her since the game came out.
> 
> I imagine this happens sometime in November, once she's found Nick, and they're on the case of her missing son. I put it in the shipping tag for them, because it's still a relationship, even if it hasn't formed into a romantic one yet.

Green eyes opened as lashes fluttered, the sight before her one that she never thought she'd see again, except in memories. Everything was how it once was, precisely how she'd remembered it, so long ago.

  
Dolores was standing in her living room, surrounded by vibrant furniture and tidy decor, untouched by the elements or weathered by the cruel passage of time. The tv was on, the current weather forecast providing a pleasant background chatter, and from the kitchen wafted the scent of coffee, freshly-brewed and steaming.

  
This was her home, her tidy, cozy abode.

  
She found herself running her fingers along the back of the couch lovingly, appreciating its soft material as if she'd never seen anything more beautiful.

  
That was, until the front door opened, and something infinitely more breathtaking happened to step past the threshold.

  
The familiar visage of the handsome man seemed unreal and ghost-like, but only in recollection. She stood, paralyzed for a few moments, her heartbeat seeming to halt entirely as he stood there in the doorway. He was living, breathing, and as real as ever. Without hesitation, Dolores took a few steps to meet her husband, her high-heels providing the proper leverage to throw her arms around his neck.

  
"Whoa!" His sturdy body held her easily, large palms upon her petite waist as a chuckle rumbled in his chest. "What did I do to deserve this kind of welcome?

  
"You exist," she whispered, with her chin upon his shoulder. "That's all you'll ever have to do."

  
 She pulled away, then, shaking hands trailing from across his broad shoulders and down to his chest. Dolores wanted nothing more than to look at him for as long as she possibly could, to breathe in the scent of her favorite cologne, memorize each wrinkle, each laugh-line, each scar. It had seemed 100 years since she'd last seen him, and it very well may have been.

  
" _God_ , I missed you." The words were choked, eyes stinging with hot tears as she pressed her lips to his. He tasted impossibly good, his mouth vibrating against hers as he hummed a satisfied little noise. When she pulled away, he was stained by her cherry-red lipstick. The warmth of his hands clenched a bit, still holding her firmly against him.

  
"Honey, I go to work every day," he said, a concerned twinkle in his eye. "Are you okay? Codsworth been keeping you company? You know, we didn't just get him to look after Shaun."

  
_Shaun_.

  
The world seemed to spin, everything rushing up to meet her quickly as she attempted to maintain a placid and unfazed expression. _Shaun_. Her baby boy... he was her reason for living, her motivation for facing each hardship, each failure, each devastating revelation. Could it really be that she'd no longer have to suffer, to search for him in a mother's anguish? Could it really be that simple?

  
"So how's my little champ?"

  
Dolores' hand was resting frozen upon Nate's shoulder. She looked up at him in a bleary-eyed daze.

  
"Why don't you see for yourself?" she asked, managing a playful tone despite the fact that she felt weak-kneed, her heart threatening to pound right out of her chest.

  
As Nate slinked an arm around her waist, they walked side-by side down the hallway, and Dolores could see how it was, or rather, how it would be, 200 years from now. A dank hallway with a single lightbulb hanging from a string, occasionally swaying in the wind whenever the elements penetrated the walls of her home. Cold, lifeless. Not like now, with portraits lining the walls, and shelves displaying heirlooms. She always turned left, to her own desolate bedroom, not having the heart half of the time to turn right instead, and catch a glimpse of Shaun's crib, destroyed by time's harsh passage, but blue enough to remind her of the good times that they'd ever-so-briefly shared.

  
This time, though, she found comfort in Nate's embrace, something that she'd missed for so long in the Commonwealth, and she knew that when she turned right this time, there was nothing to fear.

  
An accented voice, one that had spent so many nights with her, attempting to bolster her spirits with jokes in hopes that she wouldn't cry herself to sleep, resounded from the baby's room.

  
"Oh, young Shaun!" the robotic voice cooed, "I'm sure you're feeling so much better now!"

  
Stepping into Shaun's room, Dolores paused a few feet before the crib, watching as Codsworth disposed of a freshly-changed diaper in the trash receptacle, and then turned to face them. His limbs buzzed and whirred like a new kitchen appliance, uninhibited by rust or dirt particles. He was glistening and bright, and Dolores clamped a palm over her mouth to keep herself from being overwhelmed at the sight of him so happy.

  
"And it appears your father is home!" Codsworth continued cheerily. "Good afternoon, sir! Hello, mum!"  
"Hey, Codsworth," Dolores greeted, the words choked and raw in her throat.

  
"Hope he didn't give you too much trouble, Codsworth," Nate said, approaching the crib to lean over the railing, and glance down proudly.

  
"Not at all, sir! Though, I'm sure he missed you dearly. Perhaps you'd like to hold him for a while?"

  
Without hesitation, Nate was beaming as he reached into the crib, taking their son into his strong, capable arms while Dolores merely stared in awe. It was these moments that she'd missed the most, the aching in her heart dissipating as she watched the scene before her, utterly captivated.

  
Shaun babbled and cooed as Nate rocked him, the noises like fire for the hearth of her soul, and Dolores didn't even realize she was standing in place, watching her husband, her son, and her robot companion, committing them to memory like a picture. The loveliest one in the world.

  
"You wanna go to mama?" Nate asked their bundle of joy after a few minutes, and Shaun issued a noise resembling a giggle. Nate's brown eyes practically twinkled as he nodded his head towards her. "I think he wants you, Dolly."

  
Words failed her, teardrops threatening to spill if she spoke too much, so she moved towards Nate, and allowed him to gently pass their child to her. He seemed so tiny, so precious, and in that moment she knew that she'd wanted nothing more in the world.

  
"Hey, baby boy," she greeted, leaning on one hip as she instinctively adjusted the blanket wrapped around him. "Mommy's here." His weight and warmth in her pale arms felt so utterly right, and against her will, her cheek was soon tearstained as she looked at his petite features smiling up at him. Dolores sniffled, as Nate wrapped an arm around her shoulders, gently guiding her closer to him.

  
"You okay, honey?"

  
"He's just... he's so _beautiful_."

  
"Yeah," Nate chuckled, and leaned in close to kiss her on the cheek, "takes after his mom."

  
Though she wished that the moment could last an eternity, Nate's hand trailed down her back, brushing against her hip as he moved past her. "Ah, damn, I forgot to grab the mail. You got him for a minute?"

  
"Of course," she reassured.

  
Nate was soon off down the hallway, and Dolores was amazed by how normal things felt. How safe, how quaint, how warm. Codsworth had occupied himself with rearranging some of Shaun's clothing in his drawers, neatly folding it. They were little sweaters and knitted hats, hues of oranges and reds, and that's when it occurred to her.

  
"Codsworth," she said, voice hollow, "what day is it?"

  
He paused only momentarily, one of his sensors twisting to focus on her. "Why, it's Friday, the 22nd off October, mum."

  
"Oh... _oh my god_ ," Dolores said, glancing from Shaun, to her robotic friend with horrific realization. "I'm sorry. I'm _so_ sorry."

  
"Mum, the young Shaun's diapers are part of my responsibilities. Luckily, I have control over my scent receptors."

  
With more poise than she could have imagined she could muster, Dolores forced out a snort of a laugh and moved a few feet, though her legs were shaking, closing the distance between her and Codsworth.

  
"One day you'll understand," she said, and leaned over to press her lips to his metallic head. It left a slight smudge of crimson upon his reflective surface."Thank you... thank you so much for taking care of my family."

  
He did an excited little spin, like a top turned on its head. "Oh, mum! You're going to make me overheat, my goodness! It's truly no trouble at all!"

  
"Do you mind getting dinner ready? I think leftovers today will be just fine."

  
"Certainly, right away!"

  
Codsworth floated past her, nearly bumping into the side of the door in the process, heading down the hallway and towards the kitchen. Her son in her arms, right where he belonged, she followed suit.

  
In the tidy kitchen, Codsworth was already opening the fridge to prepare some sandwiches, while Nate stood at the island, going over some envelopes in hand. She moved in close, glancing over his shoulder as she continued to gently coddle Shaun in her arms. He was probably hungry. One of the starch-white envelopes, she noticed, had a distinctive symbol emblazoned on the front of it. It must have cost a pretty penny to be printed, and knowing what she knew now, it didn't surprise her one bit.

  
"What's that one?" Dolores asked, tilting her chin towards the letter in question.

  
"Something from Vault-Tec?"

  
"It's trash," she said, without hesitation, her pulse quickening, but her lips spread wide across her teeth in a forced smile. "Here, I'll throw it out."

"You sure it's not important?"

"It's just junk mail, darling."

  
Nate merely shrugged as she snatched it from his hand, cradling Shaun with her opposite, and walked right over to the trash can to toss it out. As if on cue, Shaun began the first wails of a crying spell, and she shared his sentiments exactly.  Gently bouncing him in a soothing motion, she made her way towards the couch and sat down.

  
"Codsworth, would you be a dear and get Shaun a bottle?"

  
"Of course, I'm sure the young sir is hungry. And your dinner is served!"

  
The levitating robot placed two plates down at the island, filled with rewarmed vegetables and cold roast beef sandwiches. Nate pulled out a stool, about to situate himself, when Dolores interrupted.

  
"Bring those over here, please," she requested of their metallic friend. When Nate looked over his shoulder quizzically, she merely gave a sheepish shrug.  "You don't mind if we eat right here tonight, do you, dear?"

  
"Oh, my, a special occasion!" Codsworth interjected.

  
"Letting me eat on the couch?" Nate quirked a dark, scarred-up eyebrow. "Are you sure you're not coming down with something?"

  
"Only if being lovesick counts."

  
With a remarkably satisfied smile, Nate grabbed both of the plates, setting one down upon the coffee table for Dolores, and he sat down beside her, placing his own in is lap as he began eating. The television was already set to the channel of their favorite evening program.

  
Codsworth soon had a bottle prepared and warmed, dutifully rushing to hand it to Dolores as she cradled Shaun in her arms.

  
"Here you are, mum."

  
"Thanks, Codsworth."

  
Shaun was eager for his dinner, suckling the bottle as soon as Dolores pressed it to his lips. Within moments, his eyes were closed, completely relaxed in her arms. Her own meal didn't concern her. She had her husband and son beside her, and that was more than enough for anyone.

  
When Nate easily finished off his sandwich and vegetables (leaving the carrots, she noticed... and not having the heart to admonish him today) he wrapped an arm around Dolores, and she leaned her cheek against his sturdy shoulder. Nate's large hand carefully adjusted the rocket-ship patterned blanket wrapped around their son, where he paused to gently caress Shaun's little hand. Tiny fingers reached out to take Nate's index finger in a surprisingly sturdy hold, and they both beamed.

  
"He's gonna be strong, just like his dad," Dolores cooed, voice hoarse and overcome with emotion, nudging against Nate's shoulder.

  
"Just like his mom, too," he said, and kissed her forehead.

  
Her emerald eyes, still watery with unshed tears, looked up at him. "If I were, I wouldn't miss you so much."

  
It was enough for her to break down, allowing her tears to flow freely, determined to enjoy her last few precious hours with her husband and child. This time, she'd make sure to do it right. There would be no Vault-Tec... no kidnappings, no shootings, no bleak future. They'd all be together, how it was meant to be.

  
"Hey, hey, it's all right!" Nate whispered comfortingly, "you know I'll never go too far, Dolly." His muscular arms hugged her tighter as he cradled her, just as she was cradling Shaun.

  
" _Dolly_... Dolly... hey, _Dolores_!"

  
The familiar gruff voice pulled her back from drifting motionlessly in the void, as she bolted up in bed. Her fair skin was beaded with sweat, her blonde hair slick and clinging to her forehead. Dolores' vision adjusted to the lack of light, and with a heart-wrenching sensation realized that she was back in the "new" Sanctuary, in her shabby little bed. She noticed that the pressure causing the mattress to dip in slightly at the edge of the bed was courtesy of Nick sitting there, the intensity of his glowing stare watching her intently.

  
"You sounded like you were having one helluva nightmare," he explained, "just wanted to check on ya, make sure you're all right."

  
Aside from the obvious perspiration, Dolores realized that her cheeks were wet, too...

  
"Thank you," she said, appreciative of his concern, as she attempted to subtly wipe away her shameful tears with the back of her hand, glancing off to the side. She sat up fully, watching as Nick hesitantly placed his metallic hand upon her knee, giving her an awkward pat before gently resting it there.

  
"You wanna talk about it? Maybe it'll ease your mind."

  
Silence fell, the only noise the light rustle of tree branches against the side of the house, courtesy of the howling autumn wind. Nick didn't judge her as she gathered her thoughts as well as her courage in the darkness between them, merely waited patiently until barely audible words slipped forth.

  
"Why am I here, Nick?"

  
"That's a question I find myself askin' pretty often," he shrugged. "And who's to say?"

  
Dolores shook her head, . "I just... I wish I could be back there with them. Back where I belong. Back _home_."

  
"I don't technically belong here either, but I've found that home is what you make of it. Took me a damned long time to get myself situated. But it comes, with time."  
  


"Maybe one day it'll feel like it," She studied Nick intently, trying to focus on the kindness of his features rather than the torturous visions inside of her head. Since the day they'd met, he hadn't left her side, on the trail of her missing son. 

  
"Maybe," he said, with a reassuring smile, and another little squeeze of her knee. "And for what it's worth, I think you're doin' a whole lot of good out here."

  
"Then why don't I feel good about it? I'm not like you, Nick. I'm not a detective. I don't save lives."

  
"Feelin' good isn't always easy," he said, gesturing with his opposite hand, the one that still had skin. "Sometimes it's not something bold or brassy. It's quieter than that. Kinda comes from the inside.... but you don't need to be wearing the trenchcoat and fedora to have it. Sometimes it's giving someone a word of kindness, a place to stay outta the rain. You've done all that, and you've got the gumption to go along with it. "

"Thanks, Nick," she said quietly, and they both knew where her thoughts were treading, the recesses of her mind just as dark as the nightfall surrounding them. Nick reassured her without her even having to ask it of him, as she had so many times before on nights like these.

"And you have my word, we'll find your boy. So long as you're here, I'll never go too far."

  
Eyes going wide, and lips trembling, Dolores almost thought that she was dreaming again. There was something about the way he looked at her when he'd said that. Like he meant it with all of his heart, just as her beloved Nate had.

  
"What... what did you say?" she asked softly, her voice breaking with emotion. Nick didn't even mind that she'd asked him to repeat himself, merely stated it in a different sort of way.

  
"I said, I'm here for you, Dolly."

His arms outstretched, Dolores leaned into his warm embrace, letting the tears spill forth as he cradled her delicately, her head beneath his chin. He needn't say anything more. Whatever Nick might utter, she already believed every word... and that was enough to keep her going in this cruel new world, so very far from the home she knew.  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!  
> If you'd like to see more of Dolores, you can also check out my tumblr tag for her :)  
> http://lady-of-rohan.tumblr.com/tagged/dolores


End file.
